What good's my card, then?

--

The Republican Debate this week was interesting, if only for the backdrop. Did you know that Ronald Reagan's Presidential Library has a plane in it?

Turns out, yeah. President Reagan had Air Force One completely remodeled while he was in office, and then took it home with him. Now it's on display at his library.




They wouldn't let me check it out, though.

But turning in the inter-library loan request was fun.

Lost in the Fifties tonight...

Technology today continues to scream along at light speed, bouncing through one prism after another, each new beam racing away to find a prism of it's own to multiply and fracture itself through.

I was trying to find an example of just how far and how fast personal computing technology has evolved and came across this:



It's from Weezer's "Buddy Holly" video.

(Yeah, I could have embedded it here in the blog, but the posting on You Tube said that the posting, by Universal Media Group, was "embedding was disabled by request." I figured the least we could do was honor that.)









Not quite 15 years ago, this video shipped with Microsoft's Windows 95.

A video that intentionally evoked the fifties, that came with an operating system that now feels like it came from the fifties. I wonder if anybody at Microsoft realized just how many ways this video would "date" the operating system?

And, now that I've given some of you the itch? You can watch the video on You Tube, here.

Go ahead, I won't tell.

Jonny Man & the Sand People

---
Some times dreams just offer a peek at the story waiting around the bend...

“There’s no truth to the rumors that Rounder Jon escaped from the clutches of the Sand People,” I said loudly. I’d been listening to the three men at the bar argue and debate the stories and rumors that surrounded the old tide runner for over an hour.

“What was that?” The youngest and loudest of them assaulted me with his question. Bad enough that a simple bartender would put himself into the middle of their important business. But, to dismiss the whole purpose of their conversation?

“What would you know about it.. friend?” He demanded.

“I said, There’s no truth to it. The Jonny Man never escaped from the Sand People.” I turned my attention to ragging off a bit of spilled beer farther down the bar. “I should know," I said. "I was there, and saw the whole thing.”

I worked my rag in a circle across the dark red grain of the old wood surface. It didn’t take long. The three of them rearranged themselves into new positions, coming to rest in front of me.

The gent I judged to be the elder statesman of the group was in the center now. He looked side to side, at his companions, and then his gaze settled on mine.

Not taking my eyes from his, I listened to the soft thump and subtle ring of a gold piece as it was pinned between the wood and his meaty palm.

“Another round for the three of us, and one for yourself, if you’re a’mind,” he said. I could see a faint spark of humor in his eyes.

“And, you can keep the change if you’ll tell us your tale.”

A Tale of Rounder Jon... (with no idea where it's going next.)

I'll let you know when it takes me somewhere.

Willie and Frank --

---

Join me in some light reading?

EldonHughes has a new story running over at
I Found A Knife:

Willie & Frank -- Shakespeare and Chemistry.

I also spent part of the week going back to the old school; Raymond Chandler's "The Big Sleep". It's one of Time's all time 100 Novels, written in 1939.

Are you into Film Noir? Open this book, pick any paragraph and read aloud.

"I was neat, clean, shaved and sober, and I didn't care who knew it. I was everything the well-dressed private detective ought to be."

Classic stuff.

-------------------

Elsewhere -- Ever wonder what happens when you google "Google"?

Besides another tiny rip in the Space Time Continuum I mean? (Click on the link if you really want to. It just makes my head hurt.)

Well today I tried it, and got a story on Microsoft. How the crap does that happen?

Oh yeah... that tiny rip thingy....

Jesus wished me a Merry Christmas

---

Some of the local churches (some, not all are invited...) did a light show in the park again this year. Some of the displays included live animals and people.

They depict the scene at the inn, (Joseph and Mary outside the inn. Mary is riding a donkey. A friend of mine provides some of the animals. I think he does it just so he can drive by this scene and say, "Hey you. Get off my ass.")

There's also the manger scene, then they skip right past the crucifixion and then there is a scene at the cave, with the stone rolled back and a young man wearing a fake beard and moustache, waving to the people driving by. We waved back and Jesus wished me a Merry Christmas. I yelled back Happy Birthday. He yelled back, "It was last month, but thanks!"

Hope you all had a cool yule. Let's make it a great new year, eh?

Making the List. Checking it Twice. Yup. Still there.

--
Jen, who is most definitely a Chic Chick has chucked the mouse my way,
so here we go...


The AW December Blog chain is almost halfway gone, as is the month of December,
("Christmas times a'comin', Christmas times a'comin'!")

I wanted to take the topic back to the top, with lists.

But only because I wanted to pass on something that happened this last weekend.

I was reading Christmas stories to kids over at the local library Saturday morning. As part of the session, I asked kids, while their parents could stand in the background and hear what was mentioned, just what was on their christmas lists this year.

You have to understand, here in the sticks the kids don't really see the jolly old fellow in advance. In a town where everyone knows everyone else, it doesn't work out so well. As one little girl whispered to me, so that her little sister couldn't hear, "That guy we saw wasn't the real Santa. He's the janitor at my school."

So, we discussed Christmas wish lists. There were the usual, Ipods, video games, dolls, bikes and such. And then one little girl said she wanted a remote control butterfly.

What a unique toy request, I said. Meanwhile my brain is cycling. Toys R Us? nope. K B Toys? nope. Best Buy? Penneys? Lowes? Sears- In the Craftsman aisle? Nope.

All the while I'm looking over the girl's shoulder at Mom, who is looking at the ceiling, shaking her head. I guess this wasn't a recent addition to the child's list.

The little girl's brother poked her in the arm and demanded, "I've never heard of a remote control butterfly. Do you even know what one looks like?"

She looked back at him, defiant. "Santa knows what they look like."

"Wow, no pressure there, Mom," I'm thinking to myself.

Which brings me to tonight. I just Googled "remote control butterfly" and came up with a list of them, for sale, at "adult novelty stores."

Maybe I misread Mom's expression.

How's this for a transition? Twisted Fantasies is next on the list.

---------------------------

Here's the entire list for the December Blogchain.
Check 'em out, and a Cool Yule to you all:

A Thoughtful Life
Gillian’s Food History
Getting Confused and Coming All Undone
Life in the Middle
So You Want to be a Chic Chick
Williebee
Twisted Fantasies
It Had To Be Said
Finding Boddie
Virtual Wordsmith
Random Acts of Unkindness
Chocolate for Your Brain
Virginia Lee: I Ain’t Dead Yet!

awchain

Did Mattel fold before China?

Check this out. Read a few paragraphs in.

Go find a few more stories on this. Check out the news stories on it.

Did Mattel just fold and put their manufacturer ahead of their customers?

Am I wrong on this? (hey, it's happened before....)

But if I'm right, Mattel's not getting another dime from me. It isn't just the patriotism issue, it's the practicality... the safety.

If they, as the customer, are willing to subjugate themselves to their vendor on this issue (and apparently pay them for the privilege) , what safety problems are they willing to pass on to their customers (us) next?

I don't want my family and friend's kids serving as their test lab, and I'm sure not willing to pay them for it.

Rant over. I will now go put my lead based paint covered soapbox away....

my brother's cousin's barber's carwasher told me....

---
When it comes to news in print (digital or old school) I tend to read the top three paragraphs or so of ongoing stories, and the last couple paragraphs of new ones.

With old or ongoing stories there's rarely anything new after the first few 'graphs. So, you can stay up to date just by reading the first couple paragraphs. The rest is regurgitated words from past stories, used to fill the space.

With new stories, talkradio, and TV have already given you the "fresh meat" of the story, as quickly and as many times an hour as they could. (And, some times, as accurately as they felt they could get away with.) So, when it comes to the print story, the fun stuff is the oddball things they have to come up with to fill the space.

This is pulled from this morning's USATODAY. Anybody who cares already knows the current High School Musical picture scandal story. You don't need to read that over again here. But this was filing space near the bottom:

"Michael Sands, a publicist whose clients have included the divorce attorney for Britney Spears' ex-husband Kevin Federline, said Hudgens should be commended for coming forward quickly and saying it was her pictures."

So, they felt that it was worth noting what Britney's EX husband's EX publicist thought.

Makes me wonder if Mr. Sands has a publicist of his own.

"Ooh, ooh. Tell them I said this!!!"

remember red wigglers?

---

There's one of those marquee signs on a trailer just south of town. It sits next to an open chain link gate.

It reads:

Henry's Gifts and Decor
WE HAVE LIVE WORMS

I don't have anything to add to this. You're on your own.

Dinner Impossible, The Final Episode

---
Dinner Impossible

Tonite's challenge --

You're on a beautiful, picturesque small island in the South Pacific.

You've got a box of vanilla wafers, two cans of spray whip creme and a 40 year old Hershey bar.

And here are your guests, 300 cannibals. Bon Apetit!

We are a weird species, take two

-- We've had decades of professional sports figures arrested or investigated (not always both, interestingly enough) for wife beating, drunk driving, dealing, distributing, using drugs, yadda, yadda.

A pro quarterback gets busted for dog fighting and the media goes nuts on it.

I mean, the only way this should have gotten this kind of press coverage is if he was actually fighting dogs. Lots of them. With a blindfold (him, not the dogs.) Now we're talking pay per view.

Of course I also think we should train and arm deer to fight back. Hey, it's working in Southern Illinois.

Writing news and an Elvis "Sighting"

--
Last week "Elvis" appeared at the local VFW.
It was big news in town. The local Walgreens was having a sale on cheesy "E" memorabilia. (What I want to see? A mashup of Elvis and Python memorabilia. Stuff like the "I'm not dead yet." t-shirt would take on a whole different meaning. OR! "I'm not dead yet." on the front, and on the back: "And I am NOT working at your K-Mart!"

Anyway, DB is checking out at the pharmacy/store and asks about all the knock off Elvis stuff. The nice lady behind the counter said she didn't know why they were selling it. Then she said,
"Did you hear that Elvis is playing at the V?"

And then she leaned in close and whispered, "It's not the real one. It's an impersonator!"

----

Work is coming along on the next book "That Dead Guy of Mine #2".
The next online story should start soon. (I have got to re-discipline myself.)
First book: Jazz and the Monkey Man is being pitched everywhere I can find. Currently two fulls, a partial, and a pitch out there. Keep your fingers crossed! (I can't, gotta write.)

Thanks, all!

Now available in the deluxe home game edition...

...
We had another episode of the monthly (or so) home refrigerator game--

Can You Guess What This Was?

As with all made up off the top of my head games, there are rules:

Rule 1) You must make your guess before whatever it was disappears down the garbage disposal.

Rule 2) You only get one look at whatever it was (while it's on its way to said disposal.)

Rule 3) The second person guessing is allowed to observe the facial expressions of the first guesser, and hear the gasps of disgust of all in attendance. The second guesser may use this information to help them come up with their guess.

Rule 4) You take turns being the first guesser, which also makes you the first smeller. You do not have to partake of the smelling, however, if you do, and you guess incorrectly, you will still get the points. So, take a big whiff. After all, you only live.... um, guess once.

Rule 5) Winner is the person with the most correct guesses, or the last person to pass out.

More News from Cornfield Township...

...

Mrs. Thomas, over to the Farm Bureau? You know, the one with 7 kids and a half dozen grandkids? She had hip replacement last week. She had the doctor put a bear trap in next to where her purse usually hangs. She says the kids still beg for money, but they're taking No a lot more seriously....

Oh the difference in our similarities

Standing out in my sun stroked backyard I realized how, with but one small sentence, I could demonstrate the vast gulf that exists between how I am similar to, say Marilyn Monroe and yet, how very, very different. Observe:

We might have stood, side by side, and announced: "Oh man, am I hot."

We would both have been so right... but Sooo different.

loose ends, and how cat's are teaching us to comunicate

Lest ye mere mortals have any doubt that our cats are teaching us their language, I offer this:

Meh.

If you blog, or regularly read blogs, you already know what it means, the ultimate in "yeah, so what?"

Call the cat? You get Meh-ow. Offer the cat something she thinks is boring? Meh-ow.
Hold the door open with the cat sitting right in front of it, pretending she want's out? Meh-ow.

Meh. We're halfway there. They'll teach us to talk yet.


-----------


Loose ends. I Found a Knife is done.

I'm spending the weekend "at loose ends". Feeling restless and lazy at the same time. Trying to get up the energy to see what the next story will be. I love telling/writing stories. But planning the story is like chipping paint off the house. It has to be done, but that doesn't make it suck less. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, whine, gripe... Now shut up and get to work.)

Thanks to all who have read along. That's what makes the writing fun.

Chains that find me

---

Chains that find me. Chains that bind me. Chains to make me see.

As I said a couple posts ago, I volunteered for the AW Blogchain. Kelly at Organized Chaos just tagged me, so here we go:

The Chain started with Courage, and ran from comfort foods to food security, to the amazing conditions that people often elect to live in, in order to live in Alaska. Let's touch on all of that, shall we?

First off, I lived in Alaska for a couple years as a kid. We lived about 16 miles from "The North Pole". Don't get excited. North Pole, AK is a trading post near Fairbanks. My Dad was Air Force. This was near the end of The Vietnam War. He kept a flight bag packed behind the door. We'd come home from school and there'd be a note on the table, or Mom would say, "He's gone flying. He'll be back." We never knew where to. We never knew when. But, somehow, we knew not to ask.

My last stint in the Boy Scouts happened while I lived there. I got a merit badge for camping out in 40 degrees below zero. (Turns out "Be Prepared" does not equal "Be Bright"... or even "Be Reasonable".) I caught and ate my first salmon on a camping trip there.

Oh and I've blogged about Alaska at least once in the past.

I have a cousin who spent not just one, but several years working in a salmon cannery in Alaska; one of the nastiest, coldest, most brutal jobs on the planet. I think of HER every time I'm pan frying some salmon croquettes and baking up my mac and cheese.

I'm sorry, what was that? Yes, sir, you in the back? So what?.... So WHAT?? Oh, ok.

Here's the so what:

I'm not sure who had more courage, my Dad, who went off at a moment's notice on those mystery trips; my Mom, who stayed behind with four kids and never let us see her sweat; or maybe my cousin. Not for the first canning season, but for going back for more after she knew just how crappy it could be, saving all her money to send back home to family.

Wasn't me. I was just the schmo kid who played in the snow in the winter, and spent the short summers playing triple-header baseball games. What do you mean it's time to go home? It's not even dark yet. :-)

These days I'm that guy who, more than a thousand miles from the nearest salmon stream, can pick up fresh salmon for dinner (grilled on a cedar plank with a nice whiskey & peach barbecue glaze, thank you very much); can sit on my butt in front of the biggest tv screen I've ever owned and let the History Channel and Discovery Channel remind me of just how hard my life could be; and be greatful that it was just a little bit hard when I was a kid, so that maybe I learned something on the way from here to there.

And I can sit here and be amazed, remembering that, back then, there was ONE channel on TV and that Sesame Street (oh, and the network news) aired a day to two days later than in the rest of the United States.

And now?

I can click this, scroll that, copy, paste and click away, and point you toward a site where you can see Alaska for yourself, live, in color, from the comfort of your own chair. Not that the images can really substitute for the real thing. But, for those of us who have settled into a more comfortable lifestyle, it's a peek into a world where people are living and walking on roads less traveled.

Tag, Miss Peggy. You're it.

A question about child abuse

--
If it's not appropriate to teach a child to smoke, is it child abuse to make them sit in the smoking section of a restaurant?

Or, is it just stupid?

Blindly onward unto the web

Every now and then you have to jump with full keyboard into something you've never done before.

So, I agreed to participate in the absolutewrite.com current Blogchain, #9. The idea, as I understand it is, one person posts on their blog, then each person in turn creates a post that has something to do with the previous poster's post. Also, pre-post and post-post you are supposed read the posts and add, er post, a comment. Got it? Nah, me either.

Virginia Lee is starting us off tomorrow. If you want to see how it works, (I know I do) you can follow along below.

Participating Blogs

writing@cathsmith.com - http://blog.cathsmith.com/
hunt & peck - http://www.andreapeck.blogspot.com/
Life, Writing, and Other Things - http://tjwriter.blogspot.com/
periodically.org - http://www.periodically.org/
Virginia Lee: I Ain't Dead Yet! - http://virginialeenc.blogspot.com/
Food History - http://www.foodpast.com/
A View From the Waterfront - http://www.harboradvice.com/blogger.html
Organized Chaos - http://chaostitan.blogspot.com/
Williebee - http://williebee.blogspot.com
The Road Less Traveled - http://thoughtsontheroad.blogspot.com/

aspcEa?

So a friend gave DB (Darling Bride) an i-Dog the other day. If you haven't seen one, it shakes its head and lights up and the ears move.. in time with the music it hears. Apparently you can hit a button and reset it's personality.
(Way ahead of you: Right now I have a dozen science fiction fans and scientists locked in a small room until they figure out how to do this Robert Tilton.)

After you reset it you have to make it listen to the music of your choice for half an hour so that it can develop its new personality.

DB set it up on the coffee table with one of the Music Channels playing on the TV. But a storm was rolling through and the signal kept "hiccupping".

Bottom Line: Her i-Dog has a twitch. It's so sad.